Epiphany

It’s been a while since I have written anything at all. Not that I write on a regular basis and now hat I wish to, I want to start with what is truly running in my head at this very moment. Some mind doctors might want to term it 'free association writing'.

I am finally tired of hanging nowhere. Disgusted at being that point in the graph where there are always points above and below me, a lame mediocre. Every time I visualize this graph, I think of millions of confused souls like me symbolizing the middle finger people keep pointing at each other, between the lines!, between the points.

But now that the boredom and disgust is literally creeping my insides and reminding me of the entire fairy tales where the lazy bum in body and mind is punished at the end of the day, lessons learnt. I, today take an oath upon the things I love the most, sleep and food, that I would become a better person by introducing some sense in my everyday life. If I fail myself, naaah there is nothing much to lose, a little self respect may be, and then back to the graph hoping that everyone might average out at my coordinates some day. ;)

And while I am writing this, I think, does it matter? Does anyone give a shit if you moved ahead or back, up or down? If you are the mediocre, the middle finger, the hanging lose thread or the ridiculed lazy grasshopper? No, it does not. All that matters is in the answer to these questions - have you done justice to your co-ordinates and space without losing a face? Are you content with the little things in life, can you accept yourself as yourself?

So here it goes. My plan of action. Start believing that you are THE person everyone dreams to be, the surreal feeling which lurks in some dark evil corner of our mind. I am forced to steal Obama’s nation spinning Cliché line here, pardon me, but ‘I CAN’. I shall shamelessly accept the conceited person inside me. I love myself the way I am. If someone begs to differ, I shall politely say go fuck yourself. Does this work? Well the good part - at least someone takes pride in you ;) and the rest will fall into place.